An Open Letter To Stan Kasten, President Of The Washington Nationals

dear mr. kasten-

i thoroughly enjoy going to washington nationals games. i have been going to baseball games since i was a little boy, and like most baseball fans, there is a special connection you make with the game when you go to a game and see the grass, hear the crack of the bat, and smell the hot dogs.

there is one thing about attending nationals games that i don't like, however: the ushers. see, mr. kasten, the nationals are no good. as of right now they are 15-26 and have exactly a 0.0% chance of making the playoffs considering the braves, mets, and phillies all reside in the same division. and your stadium sucks. your new baseball palace will be ready next season, but for now your crappy team plays in the crappiest of crappy stadiums, rfk. and one more thing...no one goes to nationals games either. 24,000 people attended the game today. that's 54% of capacity.

so, taking all that into account, mr. kasten, do you think you could tell your ushers to lay off folks like me who come to your ballpark, buy your concessions, support your crappy team in your crappy stadium who want to move to a better seat? why on earth should i be hassled by an usher when i try to move to a seat behind home plate when no one is clearly sitting there? why, in the 11th inning of a game against the phillies earlier this year, should your ushers care of i want to sit on the rail? there was REALLY no one left in the stadium that night! why? why not try and make me happy? when i am happy i spend money. that money goes into your pocket. that money can be used to purchase talent to fill your sparkling new ballpark that will open next year. think about it...

i don't think i am asking for much here. if the stadium was even remotely close to capacity, i could understand the need to be diligent about checking tickets. when your new stadium is complete and you draw 2.5 million fans next year, i will agree that making sure people are in their correct seats will be needed (granted, the stadium will be smaller and will have better sight lines so the need to move from the upper deck will be somewhat decreased). i'm not hurting anyone here. all i am doing is sitting in a seat that would otherwise be unoccupied. why does that matter? i don't get it. if i was forced to buy one of those precious $35 tickets i might not go to the ballpark at all and i wouldn't spend any money on concessions that support the vendors, other stadium workers, and your bottom line.

so please, mr. kasten, lets call a truce. you let me sit wherever i want and i promise to spend more money than i otherwise would at the ballgames. deal?

Day Baseball

one of the best things about having your weekdays free is heading out to the ballpark to grab some $5 seats and sitting wherever i damn well please. today i am going to catch the nats-braves game at rfk. lets go nats! with the phillies now at .500, the braves and the mets need to start losing. the nats did their part earlier this week and i hope it continues today. i also hope teddy finally wins a race! go bull-moose!

Sorry Charlie

Things didn't work out the way you had planned it.
Things fell apart at the seams.

aint that the way it goes? went down to RFK last night to watch the phils. there was a very respectable showing from the philadelphia faithful last night. i would say we represented about 35-40% of the crowd, while contributing to about 70% of the cheering. what an intense bunch those nationals fans are.

And now you're cold and sleepy.
Chirst, how did it come to this?
Hold on to those you thought were your loved ones
They'll be the ones you miss.

i started the game off, sitting alone in my usual $5 seat (read: right behind the dugout), right near the seat where i sat next to ed wade two years ago. things didnt start off too bad for the phils, adam eaton is a good hitting pitcher, but the meat of the order, mainly utley and howard, still looked like they were possessed by the ghost of pat burrell.

And now you're standing at the station
Tryin' to take what I ain't got to give.
Oh and I'm so sorry Charlie
I've got my own life to live

well, as it is with this team, hope is fleeting. brischni's homerun was a killer. however, i must say, it was one helluva at bat. he must have fouled off at least 8 pitches before he connected to go yard. thats the way those at-bats go: either the guy strikes out or hits a homer. brischni chose the latter.

Just call your friends at college
Wonder why you didn't stay
And my boss is coming down soon Chuck
He's drunk so you can't stay
No, you can't stay

but, in there defense, the phils fought back, led by the bottom of the order. by the 8th, all the nationals "fans" were out the door, which left a very empty lower bowl, split about 50-50 between phils fans and nats fans. one of the guys who stayed was this dude and his girlfriend sitting a few rows in front of me holding a pair of paper boxing gloves. one read "manuel". the other read "eskine". say what you want about philadelphians, but we can spell, thats for sure!

You did nothing to deserve this
God didn't treat you swell
Oh it all slipped through your fingers
and it all seems so unfair

it was the 8th, i think, where good 'ole charlie showed why he is considered one of the finest minds in baseball. i think he used two pinch hitters in the 8th. then more subs in the 9th. at this point, i tuned to cody and said "has charlie used all our bench players?" my question was answered when cole hamels, yes that cole hamels, picked up a bat in the 11th (i think). how is this possible? how can a manager be that inept that not only does he use all his bench players by the 11th, but that he asks his young, stud ace to pinch hit? i guess im just not smart enough to be a major league manager, otherwise i would understand charlie's genius.

And your girlfriend, she's in high school
She says she loves you a lot
Oh no, she can't support you
So you better sell more pot

And now you're standing at the station
Tryin' to take what I ain't got to give.
Oh and I'm so sorry Charlie
I've got my own life to live

So you just call your friends at college
Wonder why you didn't stay
And my boss is coming down soon Chuck
He's drunk and you can't stay
No, you can't stay
Sorry Charlie. Sorry Charlie. Oww!

two things in closing:
1) thanks to ween for the lyrics. i always knew ween lyrics would have meaning in my life
2) to the ushers at RFK: when its the top of the 12th and there are maybe 5,000 people left in the entire stadium, its OK to let people move to seats close to the action. no one cares at that point. its only an issue if you make it an issue.

countdown to 10,000 losses: 35